A Short Self-Defense Class with Sensei Shojiro Koyama, 8th Dan, JKA

No, you don't get to see the video.

Loyal readers will recall that I have the privilege of studying privately with Sensei Shojiro Koyama, of which privilege I am absurdly proud.

Recently he called a break to basics and kata, and said he was going to teach me a self-defense lesson.

He prefaced it by telling me that in Japan, policemen are often highly trained black belts in Judo, Karate, and Aikido (in that context, please read "Angry White Pajamas", because it is wildly entertaining and instructive, simultaneously).

He continued by pointing out that because they are highly trained martial artists, the police in Japan tend to believe that they can use their martial arts techniques on knife-wielding bad guys.

And he concluded by pointing out that many such superbly-trained Japanese Policemen then die as a result of knife wounds, because knives are very effective tools for letting the life out, and bad guys don't attack in the ways that a trained martial artist attacks.

Bad guys never learned how to attack correctly! As a result, when the frenzied stabbing starts, the technique (really, non-technique) is one that has never been taught to the bad guy in a dojo, and no defense was learned for that non-technique by the policeman.

The conclusion of this short discussion of self-defense against a knife is pretty simple. Don't try to defend, empty-handed, against a deadly weapon in the hands of a determined bad guy, because your odds of success are not good.

If you can interpose a chair, good. If you can interpose a chair and poke the bad guy with the legs of the chair, good. If you can swing a chair into the bad guy while you are repeating the mantra, "Feets, do yo' stuff!", all the better.

Generally, a contest of armed verses unarmed men does not turn out well for the unarmed man. Or woman. So don't enter into that contest unless there is literally no other choice.

End of lesson.

p.s. consider trying this for fun: put on a fencing mask, and give a magic marker to your buddy. Bet him you can keep him from dotting or streaking your t-shirt with the magic marker, and bet him enough to make it interesting (unless that would be illegal in your jurisdiction, of course).

The point of the exercise is to see if you can keep your torso from being dotted or streaked by a fully motivated guy of similar size and build.

And if you are that one person in a million who can keep the t-shirt clean, take a look at your arms, and ask yourself how deep the cut, and how fast the bleed-out.

And remember, it's just for fun; make sure there's a medic present at all times, right?